In this video, I share some useful tips and advice for the wedding night or the 'first night' between a married couple.
The wedding night is one of the most anticipated nights of a Muslim person's life. I know this may sound over-dramatic, but imagine that the wedding night is the first time a Muslim male or female is officially "allowed" to be alone with someone of the opposite gender, without the presence of a guardian.
With this in mind, it is important to share some advice for newly-weds, who may be terrified at the thought of being alone with their husband or wife for the first time.
It is entirely up to the couple whether they choose to have sex on the wedding night or after a few nights once they are a little more familiar with each other and feel comfortable to take things further. Also, the bride may be on her period, which would allow the couple the perfect opportunity to get to know each other better without the pressure of sex hanging over them.
It is important to remember that there is no rush and the newly married couple will have the rest of their lives to get to know each other. Once both parties are comfortable, ready and consent to taking things further, they should both make an effort to make the "first night" as memorable as possible.
Although it is completely normal and natural to feel nervous/anxious about the first time, the butterflies should not be allowed to take over. The excitement should be greater than the fear. The couple chose to be together, and the wedding night will be a night that they will remember for the rest of their lives. The last thing they want is to feel so nervous that they cannot actually enjoy their first time together.
To make the wedding night a wonderful, memorable experience for your spouse, you must get to know what he/she likes. What are his/her favourite colours and fabrics? What type of lingerie does he like? Does she like flowers or chocolates? Candles or fairy lights? The more you pay attention to the little details and make the extra effort, the more it will be appreciated by your spouse. Prepare the bedroom to please your spouse and make him/her feel as comfortable and relaxed as possible.
It is essential to look and smell good on your first night together, as you want to be as pleasing to your spouse as possible. Don't forget, most of you have been building up to this day for the majority of your adult (and even teenage) life. It is not just the women who need to smell good, men should also smell great and not overpower their new brides with nervous sweat :)
Men and women should ensure that their body hair is taken care of, including the armpits and private parts, according to Islamic tradition. Cleanliness is appealing!
Smell can be an extremely sensuous. Use a nice shampoo and make your hair feel, look and smell as gorgeous as it can, as this will really overpower all of your spouse's senses and he/she will be overwhelmed :)
One of the main fears for the new bride in particular is that her husband will hate her body. As females we can struggle with body confidence and some of us worry that our husbands will compare us to the perfect females that they see on the TV or social media. Unless you have been walking around in multiple layers of bin bags, your new husband should have a rough idea about your body shape and will not expect you to be "perfect" naked. Our husbands are generally more forgiving of our imperfections than we are of our own imperfections. If you are extremely conscious of your body, wear lingerie that is more forgiving, like teddy or babydoll nightwear.
The Muslim couple should pray together on the first night, with the husband leading the wife in prayer. What a beautiful way to start the first night of the rest of their lives in'sha'Allah :) Islam is a way of life for Muslims, which it should be on the wedding night as any other time in our lives.
Before intercourse, the Muslim couple must recite the following du'a/supplication to seek protection from the evil amongst the unseen during their intimacy: bismillaah - allaahumma jannibnash-shayṭaana, wa jannibish-shayṭaana maa razaqtanaa
Without actually describing the act of intercourse, make sure that you take it easy and make the act as comfortable as possible, particularly for the bride. Use massage oils/gels to enhance enjoyment and make things easier as it is sometimes painful and not always straightforward, especially the first time.
Make sure you have an extra set of bed covers, especially if you live with extended family as that will save you embarrassment.
After intercourse, you cannot pray salah until you have performed ghusl or the cleansing bath. It is permissible to delay the ghusl just before the dawn/fajr prayer, which would again save you embarrassment and hassle
Keep some mints under your pillow to avoid breathing morning breath into your spouse's face. He/she will need time to get used to it :)
This video really put me at ease. She explained things so well and mentioned things I never thought of. I even got quite a few good laughs in with her (she's very funny, I appreciate her making such a serious topic much lighter with humor 😂). May Allah bless you for spreading this knowledge in a mature and halal way and helping newlyweds and those anticipating marriage with this sensitive topic, Ameen.
i have a serious question
two people who dont even know each other. just meet each other on wedding night.both are hesitant and confused.i mean it just happens too fast.u dont even know ur partner properly and just are made by system to have sex.i dont think it is pleasuresable mostly for women.i think a couple should be given some time after marraige to properly understand each other and then do “it” when they are emotionally ready
Well I would say the post news never been there before it's the start off with holding hands baby hugging then cuddling to get to know each other and then you know maybe spend the night with each other and then maybe the next day you consummate the marriage
Strangely its not an imp topic at all... one need not be prepared and well organised with tips and tricks for the moment... if it is done halaal way then everything comes naturaly and beautifuly and peacefuly from Allah.. and its an experience to each.. cant watch the whole video sorry! Thnx for trying though.
I never did any of what u call "imp discussion's" and by the grace of Allah im happily and smartly married for 10 years now.. it all came to me with time and i matured everyday beautifuly which was a wonderful experience to remember ofcourse without being so well prepared for all this.
I want to repeat...people following vloggers know how to research.. this was just not an imp topic to discuss here and i strongly stand by my opinion neither i am stopping people to watch it if they find it any helpful or even just for a masala entertainment
+Miah 101 i know so many in generation today who love to have bigger families... i myself wish to have 4 kids atleast alhamdulillah while im a proud mother of 2 by far.
To mention most of the older generations never had kids because they just happend to them but because they wished to have bigger families. atleast i can refer to the families im talking about, cant talk about ur side
Share Smiles I understand what you mean ... but women and especially in our culture still fail to do their own research. Some think that contraception is wrong and virginity mean the hymen’s has to be intact. And tbh the older generations did have problems , they had cousin marriage and thought that consent didn’t matter in sex when In fact it does. Look at all these Asian families with 5+ children because the older generation didn’t know what contraception was or thinks its wrong
+Miah 101 she talks about first night experience which im not sure where it landed later cause i didnt watch the entire vlog and then here u talk about basic safety which can be researched or talked to a specialist in person rather discussing it witu a random vlogger.. im not comfortable discussing all these personal moments on social platforms..i find it extremely unnecessary..
I agree low in education women's might be unbelievably so naive with all this info...but now plz dont tell me ladies watching vlogs here are so illiterate that they cant do research from proper sources rather then vloggers
Our mom's and grand mom's never had such openly discussing vloggers..still i guess they didnt had any problem's as such in their intimate reationship
Share Smiles Why not? I mean yes you need to be let it happen naturally because it’s more better like that but you need learn about safe sex. Most women don’t even know you have to PEE after sex so you don’t have a UTI
Since in Islamic wedding couple don't know much about each other, y not spend the night talking and getting to know each other other than having the entire focus on sex.? It will eventually happen wouldn't it... N for those who don't mind doing 'it' on the first night itself do they even need any tips anyway?
I had to deal with this. It's really important to try and communicate with your partner, so he understands and respects what you're going through and experiencing. For the duration that you're not ready for penetration, do other things for pleasure. You can perform oral, or handjobs, and they can also release by rubbing against you. I also suggest that you let him/ask him to insert fingers first, so you get used to the feeling of having someone else inside of you. Lube is so so so important!!!! I cannot stress this enough!!
Also - do du'a, that allah makes it easy for you. Don't ever underestimate the power of du'a.
Humour helps, too. Ask him to massage you, and if you can massage him. Most guys know that it takes a while to 'warm up' a girl but if it's their first time too they prob won't have a great idea of how to go about it.
Please feel free to message me/contact me about this if you have any more questions or anything. Had to deal with it for a while, but alhamdulillah things are so so so good now.
Been happily married for 5 years alhamdulillah, watched this for interest's sake, just wanted to say thank you for talking about this"taboo" subject for those who needed it. Especially the dua for protection, that's a great tip I had no idea about until literally on the day of my nikah my youngest aunt called me aside and told me about, my family isn't the most religious or knowledgeable in Deen.
Love and duas from South Africa :)
90% of pakistani girls are opened up in the uk already.if they arent its because they've opened up their arse hole to someone to try and fool the future husband.this advice is really for the 10% ugly bitches that havnt been laid 😑
U need to put your head in u know where...and you better find something else to do with your life because you seems never been disciplined I don't know how to put it but I have never seen any one specially Muslim woman or man talkin how to have a sex with their Partners shame on you. on such topic I heard there are books people like to read books for themselves it's a private thing it's a personal thing you dumb head you. by the way that eyeshadow you put on it's hideous go wash your face repent do something better with your f****** life
Mohib Khan where you from my bro?
Cuz I haven’t heard this unique name b4
It’s because I’m planning to be Muslim because I watch a lot of videos based on Islam and I’m touched
Im about to be engaged but before the engagement I’ll be Muslim and my partner
Shamsa and all people . Help about Max problem about sexual weakness. All 70% people . Any one or all share to your home remedies to cure this problem . Every one share what he eat his sex power increase . Ok
I think watching ur video..u r very excited as if very day is first nyt to u....ur accent is errrr to my ears.n topic is too awkward...come up with good topic which cud b more of knowledge....if not zip lips...lol
My wife was a virgin our wedding night. But I was the one nervous. She was ready lol. On another note though I am not Muslim. But her mother who is a devout Muslim said and I quote “We both serve the same creator. You are a good man. This is Allah’s choice.” Yet why so many besides my wife’s family who are Muslim hate us? First because of my color (I’m not Pakistaní, I’m black) secondly for me not being Muslim. I was even going to convert but had so much hate towards me I changed my mind. I’m not being negative mind you, just speaking what has happened. But was just curious.
The Melting Pot Family sadly there are a lot of muslims that judge one another but don’t let anyone ever get in the way between you your wife and god if you wanted to convert who cares what they say do it for yourself and god. There will always be haters sadly but keep your head up
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